My Story Part II: Excavating My Soul
I met my husband, Peter; at 21 and by 23 we were married with a precious baby girl of our own. They are the loves of my life.
When my daughter was about to turn the age I was when I was abused, I became deeply depressed. I learned this is not uncommon, but admitting I needed help felt like I had some how lost a battle with my abuser. Asking for the help I desperately needed would not be easy.
I spent most of my thirties excavating my soul from what seemed like the rubble of my childhood. During this time my artwork was a great blessing and a big part of my healing. I was able to give voice to the pain that had been buried within.
The monk, Thomas Merton, said "Art enables us to lose ourselves and find ourselves at the same time".
Violence and violations in their many forms do more than mark the body and the mind they rob one of trust. Not just the trust of others but trust of your own value and worth as a human being; trust of your own mind, body and intuition. But there comes a time when the yearning for wholeness exceeds the familiarity of despair and you ask… have I suffered enough?
During my first visit to my therapist he told me “You won’t believe this now, but a time will come that you will find a gift in this”. He was correct on both accounts. My heart feels whole and full of love. I trust people again; I trust my intuition about people and I now know I am worthy of love and respect.
I have discovered on my journey that the power of art to serve healing is a phenomenal tool. Whether it’s emotional, physical or spiritual healing, it helps.